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A man like me at this stage in my life should not feel this way, or so I thought. Here I was a 40-year-old widower finding myself enraptured like a teenager for this woman. A younger woman at that, but OH what a woman she is. She is naïve and yet wise beyond her years, possessing a wonderful mix of intelligence, insecurity, and common sense. She is in my eyes childlike and yet filled with a smoldering passion that burns deep just beneath the surface. She awoke feelings of joy, tenderness, hopeful love, and raw lust in me I had buried so deep I never thought I’d feel them again.

We found each other when neither one of us was looking nor seeking a mate. Those first tentative steps were slow and cautious as we both came to realize over coffee and conversation that something between us just seemed right. After countless phone calls and letters and chats on the Internet we came to know each other.

I learned her mother had ruled her every move and when she finally got her own apartment at the age of 26 she found herself unable to make decisions because she lacked any self-confidence. Her mother is a vile woman who ridiculed her every decision and whose constant criticism has made her an easy target for the bullying slugs she had dated.

She could put together bank loans and mortgages and yet found her own bills to be something she couldn’t handle. She had decorated her apartment wonderfully but had a hard time deciding what to eat for supper. She would get dressed up on a Friday night just to go shopping because she lacked the courage to walk half a block to a local pub when they had a band even though she loved to dance.

Instead she would sit by the open window and listen to the music and laughter. Surrounded by people she was alone and I often felt the same way.

After I lost my wife I often sat alone on my patio with a drink and now found myself wondering how many times we had both sat in the dark waiting for some one to find us and yet here we were separated by only a few city blocks.

I am a spankophile by nature and was terrified she would either laugh at this or be disgusted by my confession. To my surprise this quiet and shy girl brought this up before I had the chance. She confided in me that before her Father left her Mom when she was 18 she had received regular bare bottom spankings and paddlings.

Always given by her Father, but usually by her Mother’s order she found that although she hated them, afterward when she was forgiven and hugged by him, she felt loved and guilt free. She would be spanked for anything her Mom felt she did wrong.

If her grades slipped from an A to a B+ and it was the paddle, oversleep and leave the bed unmade, it was a spanking, come home late and it was the strap! After he left there were no more spankings but her Mother’s non-stop criticism and put downs had piled on plenty of guilt and a lack of self-respect with little affection and no suadiye escort release.

Armed with months of conversation our first date was simply a walk by the river with an ice-cream cone in one hand and her hand in my other. We talked about everything and anything and I found her to be simply enchanting. Dressed in jeans and T-shirts all was well till a sudden summer shower sent us running about ¾ of a mile to her apartment laughing all the way. There in the hall, dripping wet and shivering, we kissed for the first time. The gentle softness of her lips melted my heart right there.

She brought me a towel and took my wet shirt to the dryer. Then she changed into sweat pants and a sweater. We sat on her couch as the thunder rumbled and the lightning flashed and when the power went out and the room fell into darkness, she snuggled up to me and for a brief time my world was perfect. We kissed and cuddled there on her big couch till she drifted off to sleep with her head on my lap. When I awoke she was still there and the mornings first light was coming in the windows making her look angelic sleeping on my lap. She woke up with a start and a looked at with a sleepy smile and we both laughed. I scooped her up in my arms and carried her to her big bed where a dropped her as she shrieked and giggled.

I told her I had to go home and change for work. She reached up, hugged me and gave me a kiss. I had forgotten the simple pleasure of passionate kisses. I told her I wanted to take her to dinner that night and she answered with a happy “yes.”

So for the next month we slowly became inseparable. She surprised me with her sexual hunger and the uninhibited way she enjoyed sex. Smart, independent, very feminine, yet I sensed her deep insecurity. She had a need for reassurance and guidance on a personal level. I began to realize also that she associated spanking with forgiveness and with love. She had often spoken glowingly of her father and mentioned many times about him spanking her. I came to realize the doubt and guilt feelings she carried, as emotional baggage had been wiped clean when she was punished and then forgiven. To her punishment and forgiveness equaled love.

Things had been going fine and I certainly never had any reason to punish her when she forced the issue by doing something unexpected. I had often taken her over my knee for play spankings and had even happily spanked her ass during lovemaking but never for punishment.

I noticed that whenever something went wrong like her being late for a date or not ready on time, or even something simple like burning dinner, forgetting to return videos or anything of that nature she would get upset with herself and look at me expectantly. I never chastised her and instead felt a hug and a gentle word of encouragement was called for. This often left her quiet and brooding for some time after and I sensed she was somehow disappointed. I yakacık escort knew in the past her mother and boyfriends would berate her for every little thing so I tried the opposite approach, for her shortcomings were few and minor. She carried a lot of guilt in her so I tried to build her self-confidence. It was I found out, the wrong approach to take.

It had been a bad week for her. There was lots of stress in work with deadlines and closings to be ready for. She ran out of gas one night on the way home from work and I had to go bring a can of it to rescue her. Thursday night she forgot about our dinner date and worked late while I sat in a restaurant for over 90 minutes till she arrived and sat with a guilty look throughout dinner. Friday night she tried to make it up to me by making my favorite dinner but she fell asleep and baked our lasagna to crispy shoe leather. She was in tears as I sat down to hack into it and couldn’t help but smile at her. I was thinking how much I loved this girl when suddenly she asked me to leave and said she didn’t want to see me anymore. I was stunned and hurt at this and she began to cry bitterly with her head in her hands.

“You don’t care,” she told me weeping, “you never even get upset when I do things wrong. It must not matter to you what I do!”

I was stunned and told her that I most certainly did care and that she mattered very much to me. She looked at me with eyes swollen with tears and then the final piece of the puzzle was put in place for me.

“You are too nice to me,” she whispered, “I don’t deserve someone like you.”

Then anger filled me, I saw what all those years with her mother had done to her and I felt helpless rage towards that awful woman. I also understood why she spoke fondly of her father and the spankings she received. Her mother had programmed her to feel guilty about every little thing that went wrong and her Father relieved these feelings by punishing her and made her feel loved afterwards.

All those little things that happened this last week had built up inside her. She felt guilty and expected or needed release. I had no intension of walking away from this girl I was crazy about and as I sat looking into her tear stained face I knew what I had to do.

I stood up and pushed my chair back into the middle of the floor and strode around the table. Taking her firmly by the arm I led her back to the chair with out saying a word. Her eyes were wide as saucers as I pulled her over my lap, but she went with out protest. She wore tight denim shorts that encased her wide round globes perfectly. My hand seemed to fit these cheeks perfectly as I began to stroke them.

“What are you doing?” she asked in a timid voice as she began to tremble.

“Giving you what you want and need,” I replied. “How dare you try to push me out of your life when you know how great we are together? Don’t ever push me away when şerifali escort you know you need me as much as I need you. I love you and don’t you ever forget it!”

With that I began to spank her pretty backside. She gasped and moaned at first then a hand came back and I quickly pinned it to her back. I spanked her firmly and covered her whole bottom with strokes from my hand. She began to kick and wiggle after awhile but I continued till the denim felt warm to the touch.

“Stand up”, I said to her as I helped her to her feet.” We’re not done yet!”

“I’m ssooorrryyyy, she whined as I unfastened her shorts and worked them down her hips till they fell to her ankles. I took her by the arm and marched her to the dinner table and had her bend over it and grab the other side. Surprisingly she did so with out protest flattening her belly to the table, her round globes stuck up and out invitingly. I grabbed the large plastic spatula from the counter and raised it over the inviting target she presented. For few brief seconds I wavered thinking instead of plunging into this most inviting of bottoms offered up to me.

Taking a deep breath I placed a hand on her back and swung, SPLAT the plastic cracked and she shrieked at the sting of it, I think she was expecting my hand. I swung steadily as I lectured her.

” You will not SPLAT, ever do that SPLAT, to me again SPLAT. You know SPLAT, how good we are SPLAT, together SPLAT! From now on SPLAT, when you start SPLT, getting down on yourself SPLAT ,I’m going to take you over my knee SPLAT! Be cause in case you didn’t notice SPLAT, I’ve fallen in love with you.”

I tossed the spatula on the counter and pulled to her feet turning her around to face me and she fell against me sobbing. I held her close and kissed the top of her head while rubbing her back as she buried her face into my chest and cried herself out.

When she was under control she looked up at me with her tear stained face and said, ” I’m sorry, please don’t ever leave me. Just love me please, love me now!”

We kissed then and for me my passion for this girl erupted. Two sets of hands fumbled with my pants and she kicked her shorts away. Grabbing hot cheek in each hand I lifted her up, she wrapped her legs around me and impaled herself on my engorged cock. We kissed as we thrust against each other and she bit my neck as we quickly came together as I stood holding her to me in the middle of her kitchen.

Shaking and drained I led her to her bathroom were we shared a long hot bubble bath in her big claw foot tub. There as we soaked with back to my chest we talked. I informed her of some new rules I was laying down. She listened intently and nodded her agreement. From now on things would be different.

I told her that from now on if she felt she hadn’t done something properly she was to write it down. If that wasn’t enough to make feel better then she was to bring me her list and we would talk about it. If I felt she deserved it or her actions told me she needed the release I would punish her.

Later in bed she sighed contently as we snuggled together and again I wondered how could a man at this stage of my life get so lucky?

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